Vital Secrets For A Successful Family (2)
Vital Secrets For A Successful Family (2)
It is a good day for you! Last week, we saw the place of digging into the Word of God to establish our desires for our families. When the Word is discovered and applied with wisdom, treasures that makes for fulfilment in family life are uncovered. Today, I shall be looking at The Realities of the Covenant of Marriage.
It is important for us to understand what marriage is all about. Many people, including Christians, have a misconception about marriage. Some think that it is just the coming together of a man and a woman to bear children. Some others think that it is a kind of friendship or relationship.
Scripturally, marriage is a covenant and until you have this understanding, you may never enjoy fulfilment in your family. Marriage is a covenant between God and the couple, in the first instance, and then between the couple themselves. So, when you are entering into a marriage relationship, it is important for you to know that you are entering into a covenant with God and with your spouse. Malachi 2:14 says: Because the Lord hath been witness between thee and … the wife of thy covenant.
What is a covenant? A covenant is an agreement between two people. It is a relationship that must not be broken and if it is ever broken, a penalty follows suit. A covenant is also for a lifetime and I believe strongly that is why the Word of God says in Ecclesiastes 10:8: He that breaketh the edge, a serpent shall bite him. A promise can be claimed, but a covenant cannot. In a covenant, you have to abide by some rules and regulations and as you do these, you enjoy the benefits therein. When you walk in terms with the covenant, God fulfils His own part of the covenant.
Success in marriage is not a function of prayers. It is basically a function of walking with the terms of the covenant. The only place prayer is needed is for divine grace to walk in line with the demands of the covenant. Prayer can never take the place of obedience to the terms of the covenant. Therefore, instead of going from place to place seeking solution to the problems of your family, settle down for knowledge of your covenant responsibility and stay committed to its fulfilment. It is in engaging that covenant responsibility, that your desire lies.
The marriage covenant is best described as a triangle, with God on top or at the apex, and the man and his wife at the bottom or the base, everyone playing their part independently … As unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22). God created you and made you a part of that family for a purpose and you will be accountable to Him for the fulfilment of that purpose. Husband and wife have covenant obligations to each other for which they will also be held accountable. Your responsibility to obey the terms of the covenant is not dependent on your spouse fulfilling his or her own part. As far as God is concerned, you have been given an individual responsibility and you must be accountable to Him for its fulfilment.
The failure on the part of your spouse for the non-performance of his or her responsibility is not a sufficient excuse for your non-performance. For instance, as a man, you cannot say the failure of your wife to submit to your headship is the reason you cannot love her. The same goes for the woman; whether your husband loves you or not, you are under an obligation to submit to him in everything. When you fulfil your own part of the covenant, God will also fulfil His own part which is to give you peace, joy, fulfilment and every good thing you desire in your family. God is constant; His side is stable and He doesn’t change (Malachi 3:6). He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8). He will do whatever He says He will do. What does that mean? Whatever good you see God do for any family, He can do the very same thing for you because He is no respecter of persons. If He has to change your spouse’s attitude in response to your obedience, He will do it.
The Bible says: The king’s heart is in the hand of the Lord, as the rivers of water: he turneth it whithersoever he will (Proverbs 21:1). The turning of your spouse’s heart is but a light thing with the Lord, for with Him nothing shall be impossible. Just concentrate on pleasing Him by your obedience to His command and He will please you by the fulfilment of His part of the covenant.
When your covenant relationship with God is in place, your covenant relationship with your spouse becomes a very easy thing to observe. If you get committed to obeying the Lord, by either loving your wife or submitting to your husband, you will discover that it becomes a thing of joy for you to do. It becomes a delight to show love or submit. It is no longer mechanical but spontaneous, and all that could ever be desired in a home becomes cheaply yours.
God is a God of covenants and the benefits of His covenants are only available to those who have a covenant relationship with Him. He said in His Word: Gather my saints together unto me; those that have made a covenant with me by sacrifice (Psalms 50:5). You can become a part of those in covenant with Him by inviting Jesus Christ into your heart as your Lord and personal Saviour, as you pray this simple prayer with me: Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am sinner. I cannot help myself. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your blood. Deliver me form sin and satan to serve the living God. I believe You died for me and on the third day, You rose that I might be justified. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.
Congratulations! You are now born again! All-round rest and peace are guaranteed you, in Jesus’ Name. Call or write, and share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org, email@example.com; OR 07026385437 and 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).