How to Have a Successful Courtship (3)
FAMILY MATTERS, SEPTEMBER, 2017
How to Have a Successful Courtship (3)
I welcome you to the presence of God. For the past two weeks, I have taught on the keys to a successful courtship and the length of courtship. Today, I want you to Beware of These Forbidden Fruits.
Pre-marital sex is simply, sex before marriage. Many couples live together before marriage to see if they are capable of child bearing. Many end up messing themselves up by engaging in the works of the flesh. The Word of God lists the various work of the flesh: Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21).
Marriage was designed to bring honour to man and when the bed is defiled, the honour is taken away. If you are in courtship, you are not permitted to engage in sexual intercourse or anything that leads to it. If you do that, you are committing fornication and you are defiling your marriage bed thereby taking away the honour in your marriage. The marriage bed is for the married only. To engage in sexual intercourse as a single is a sin against your own conscience and God. Defiling the marriage bed, as a single, is the quickest route to shame in marriage; whether you are marrying the person involved or not.
For instance, if you are still single, stay clear of sex till you are legally married. The Bible enjoins singles to present their bodies as a living sacrifice unto the Lord (Romans 12:1). In other words, the presentation of your body unto the Almighty God as a living sacrifice is your reasonable service unto God. It doesn’t matter whether you sleep in the church every day, as long as your body is not kept pure, that service is not acceptable unto God.
Despite the volume of money you bring to the Church, when you defile the marriage bed, whether as a single or as a married person, whatever service you render to God has no record and will never receive a reward. You may be in the choir and your voice is as sweet as honey God’s eyes do not behold you; because, if the eyes of God behold you at all, it will be for judgment. It doesn’t matter the post you hold or your position. You can even be the leader of any board in the Church, Romans 12:1 is still in the Word of God. Until your body is presented to God as a reasonable service, every other service that you render is unreasonable.
The dictionary meaning of the word “fornication” is any unlawful sexual intercourse between an unmarried man and woman. In the Bible, the Greek definition of the word “fornication” is to commit illicit sexual intercourse.
Today, fornication is no longer regarded as sin in our society; it has become a way of life. Permit me to say, that the sin of fornication is even more pronounced in the Church of God, today, than anywhere else in the world. As a Christian, your body has been bought with a price; it is not meant for fornication rather, your body is meant to glorify God. The Word of God says: Flee fornication… know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s (1 Corinthians 6:18-20).
Young ladies, don’t keep messing up your lives about with men because of the money they offer you. Your beauty is not meant for business. Remember, God who gave it to you can call you back anytime. Refuse to sell your body for money for your soul is more precious to God! You may say, “I have to do something to be able to keep up with my financial needs.” Your life is much more valuable than money. You may be a fornicator and still go to church, sing, clap and dance. When they say, “Lift up holy hands and let’s worship the Lord”; you also lift up yours. It is not your kind of hands they are talking about. The Word of God says: Who shall ascend into the hill of the Lord? or who shall stand in his holy place? He that hath clean hands, and a pure heart; who hath not lifted up his soul unto vanity, nor sworn deceitfully (Psalm 24:3-4).
Moreover, some even claim, “After all, we are going to marry, so why can’t we sleep together on the same bed?” God knows that you are going to get married, but more often than not, you know what happens? After he must have seen your nakedness, the interest is no longer there because the love has waned. As I always tell people, more often than not, it is the lady that experiences more of the shame. Now, that the man has seen your nakedness, he can say, “I’m sorry sister, in fact God didn’t give me the leading, I have made a mistake; now go your way and let me go my way, God will give you your husband. He will also give me my own wife”. Why? You have sold yourself out to him and there is nothing new anymore.
In addition, marriage is honourable so, the bed should be undefiled. For you to experience honour in your marriage as a single, you must lay a good foundation by keeping yourself pure. Parents, begin to teach your children before they get to the stage of committing atrocities.
You need to surrender your life to Christ in order to have access to God’s grace to live a pure life. You surrender by confessing your sins and accepting Jesus as your Lord and personal Saviour. That way, you are born again. If you are ready for it, please say this prayer and be born again: “Dear Lord Jesus Christ, I come to You today. I am a sinner. Forgive me my sins and cleanse me with Your Blood. I accept You as my Lord and Saviour. Make me a child of God today. Thank You for delivering me from sin and satan to serve the living God and thank You for accepting me into Your Kingdom.”
Congratulations, you are now born again! If you prayed this simple prayer of faith with me, you are now a child of God. He loves you and will never leave you. Read your Bible daily, obey God’s Word and seek Christian fellowship (John 14:21).
With this, you are guaranteed all-round rest and peace in Jesus’ Name! Call or write to share your testimonies with me through firstname.lastname@example.org, 07026385437 OR 08141320204.
For more insight, these books authored by me are available at the Dominion Bookstores in all Living Faith Churches and other leading Christian bookstores: Marriage Covenant, Making Marriage Work, Building A Successful Home and Success in Marriage (Co-Authored).